Rehab?

No, I’ve never have been addicted to any Schedule I or II substances in my life, nor am I a heavy drinker. But this is exactly what I feel is like to take an impromptu week-long vacation from the place that for years has been basically your home and it’s inhabitants, your second dysfunctional family. I had to do it though. It was either that, or slide into an even deeper depression. People that I’ve grown to care about were getting hurt as the days went on and it hurt me to see them get hurt. The worst part of it all was that feeling of not being able to do a damn thing about it.

I’ve been told that, just like hardcore addicts, that distancing yourself away from those places and people that you have deep connections with, has the same symptoms as chemical withdrawal. The first two days have been hell and it took me by surprise because I thought that this was just going to be something like a working vacation for me. A week off away from all the drama, catching up on some old PC games that I haven’t played in a while, writing on this blog more, starting a new feature here, where I would be posting some of my classic stuff from way back in the day. Instead, all I ended up doing was desperately trying to find another place to get my fix, while going through mood swings and realizing that researching and writing my next post was going to be a chore, now that I no longer have the anger that fueled me years ago to write my best shit. The edgy good stuff that when I read it now, makes me laugh my ass off.

Maybe I could try and be that asshole again. But now I would be haunted be feelings of guilt, thinking about being hounded by the Politically Correct brigade and the easily offended. My new-found sensibility has turned me into a fucking pussy. It would be easier if most people knew how to take the things I and others like me say, with a grain of salt. However, as The Amazing Atheist (love him or hate him) said in one of his videos, we all live on Planet Wuss now.

I’ve been told that I should get out more. Maybe go to the flea market tomorrow, buy a poor quality pirated movie or two, some kabobs and a beer. Take in the small town kitsch that has been my real life environment for the past several years. The last time I’ve been to any place worth a damn on this rock was back in 2007, for my sister’s college graduation. Who knows? Maybe I’ll find that pair of aviator glasses that I’ve been looking for? Now if only I could get some fucking money out of my corporate wage slave debit card, without the local ATM’s charging me a fucking eye for it.

Anyway, here I am, writing this and downloading some patches for the original Fallout game. Yep, I’m going to play it! Last time I played it completely was years ago and I might as well do so again. I remember during the first night of my “vacation” how I tried looking up stuff on the game and yet I felt so down, that I felt disgusted. How can anybody in their right mind feel disgusted at such a great game? No one can unless you are not in your right mind. I certainly ain’t there right now. I want to know if everything will be alright in the days to come, next week, next month, next year? Yet all I feel is uncertainty. I fucking hate uncertainty.

Right now I’m going to log on to what is perhaps one of the most poorly coded and bug riddled MMOs out there at the moment. It sucks in so many ways, yet once you start, you can’t stop. After all, you can’t one day decide to stop being responsible for the welfare of your extra-solar colonies, when you have things to worry about, like protecting them from Brazilian raiders who don’t speak English and understand the gentleman’s agreements that rule the honor system that we built in our particular server, or acquiring that rare piece of equipment that will give you the tactical edge during PvP battles. That game reminds me of my days back when I played a graphically simpler, yet more engaging game online that ruined even more an already doomed “friendship”, over shit like my need to actually sleep or not letting my more experienced friend join our team because he was “a bad influence over me”. I certainly don’t miss those days, but these past few days can be a runner-up for “Most Stressful Time In Ramm’s Life” award.

In the time that it has taken me to finish up this post, I should already have an answer to my troll powder keg question that I set up in order to research my first planned article in years. Like all things that have changed, it’s not particularly troll-ish or mean. But knowing my fellow inmates (from now on I will be referring to my fellow Puerto Ricans as “inmates”, for we are all prisoners in a prison of our own creation) passion for bullshit political discussion, it will either be read the wrong way and be eliminated before anybody responds, or they take it as a personal affront against their ideological leanings and respond with ad hominem attacks to what is in reality a rather serious question that I find no one even seriously ponders over here. Hang on anonymous Chinese aspie  dude, the answers that I promised you are coming! I just hope that it doesn’t trigger your need to argue about Christianity and the need to eliminate paganism.

I’m going now. I have another long night ahead of me and hopefully it will involve me ridding some farm of radscorpions and the future president of the NCR from raiders, while trying to bring a water chip back to my Vault and then save the post-apocalyptic world from Super Mutants.

Ramm’s Tyolka Tuesday #7

I’ll admit it. Today was a busy day for me and I’m tired. So I’m just going to post some vids from Bears & Vodka. A group of young Russian students who decided to parody and challenge the stereotypes that people have about Russians. Yeah They’re funny and all. But I mostly come to see Irina Vodka. I’f you want to see an actual Russian smile, then she does that quite well. Oh those “new Russians”!

 

Ramm’s Tyolka Tuesday #6

This week, we’re taking the Wayback Machine to the Soviet Era. A time where uncorrupted for the most part by the West, Russian beauty was at it’s finest. I know jack-shit about Soviet Cinema. But I’m confident that I can tell a pretty face when I see one. Keep in mind that most of these women today are in their late 50’s to early 70’s and they still look pretty good. So here we go. Soviet Era film stars. Enjoy it, Fuckers!

Image

Anastasiya Vertinskaya

Image

Ariadna Shengelaya

Image

Elena Proklova

Image

Galina Belyayeva

Image

Irina Alfyorova

Image

Irina Miroshnichenko

That’s it for this week, folks. But fuck do I wish I could post more stuff, more often.

 

 

Ramm’s Tyolka Tuesday #5

It’s Tuesday. Yep, more Tyolkas from the Great Motherland. This week is a kinda special one, as this week is a fan request by a lady that knows exactly what a hot girl is supposed to be. Man, I should get more girls to submit ideas for this shit. Anyway, yeah this week is dedicated to Russian on-and-off pop duo and professional fake lesbians, t.A.T.u. Who said that seedy Russian music producers with ties to the mob don’t have an eye for what sells? Enjoy it, assholes.

normal_2004027187283696646_rs tumblr_mm0l5vKfTd1rndegno1_500

da

large

da?

Тату Премия RMA MTV28/11/08 Лужники

DA!

lena_katina_72475_tatu_hparahombres2007_008_122_73lo_58AKHOc.sized

Lean kinda playing the innocent one, as always.

2

Apparently Julia Volkova had some shit done to her face and she now looks like Eva Longoria. I mean shit still looks kinda hot here. But she had a really beautiful Slavic face before.

P.S.- I know the sizing sucks. So just click on the pics and you should get the larger version.

I’m out. Time to play some Star Supremacy and hope that the Brazilians aren’t out claim jumping again.

Fuck My Life

If there ever was a worse time to be me (and believe me that most days I feel like it couldn’t be worse) then today can be called “The worst time to ever be Rammspieler”. The title says it all.

Fuck My Life.

If there is a bright center to the universe, I am now on the spot furthest away from it. Both literally and figuratively. I thought I was going to come on here with some good news and cheer to those who know me. Yet here I am, hanging my head as low as it’s ever been, in defeat. Just when I thought that I was about to start working my way towards better and brighter things in life, it all comes down in a nasty combo of bad timing, being fucking poor, not being able to go where I want and when I want, and for the finishing button strike to turn it into a Mortal Kombat-style Fatality to Fate itself, family friends who say they want the best for you, only to back out at the last minute in an act of hypocrisy so well played out, that only a fellow Puerto Rican can pull it off and get sympathy for it.

Today I was supposed to come on here and say that it was my first day at my new job. That while it may not be a totally awesome job, at least I wasn’t going to be making burgers and jacking-off into the “special sauce”, out of spite. I was supposed to say that I was going to be waking up at ungodly hours of the morning (which is actually more like my “daytime”, but it’s no fun if I have to sleep through it.) to go to a nearby city where the company I was going to work for, has their regional offices, take the company van and go wherever they sent me and a bunch of other minimum-wage slaves to go scan bar-codes, count merchandise and occasionally set up and stock the shelves of multinational stores that are just opening and are too lazy and cheap to have their own people do it. The hours were going to suck and the work was going to be tedious. But I was going to gladly do it because I gained a reason to do so, beyond mere survival at near-poverty levels. But now I feel that that one little reason to look forward to wearing all-black non-slip work shoes, Dickies, the company shirt and sweating it out, passing scanning equipment whilst store customers are ruining your shit by taking stuff out and putting it where it doesn’t belong while trying to do it as fast and as accurate as you can, is even further out of reach than before.

No I wasn’t fired. But as today was my first day at work, tomorrow I will be going into the offices and saying that I quit because “of circumstances beyond my control”. Those circumstances being, like I hinted at above, that the people who were bugging me the most to get a job and who said that they were going to help you, all of a sudden decided that they can’t help you out because “they just can’t”.

Obviously the only logical thing to do now is to keep on looking for a job that perhaps won’t inconvenience those who supposedly were on my side.

If there is one silver lining to all this, it is that I at least got paid for my training and perhaps there are other ways of getting closer to that Bright Spot in The Center Of The Universe.

Ramm’s Tyolka Tuseday #4 (+ announcement of an announcement)

Yeah, I’m getting lazy alright. Also there is apparently a lack of material of Russian women as of late. Why, Mr. Putin? The people demand answers! In the meantime, I’ve decided to post a video of one of may favorite Russian chicks on YouTube. Genia (however I think it’s pronounced as “Zhenia) is a Russian woman who lives in California, has a Mexican boyfriend, and does most of her videos in Spanish. But she provides convenient subtitles in both English and Russian, so you can understand. Oh yeah. She has a gay, Ukrainian horse with a horn that he grew after catching his girlfriend cheating on another horse, or something, so no it’s not a unicorn.

Oh yeah I sorta have an announcement to make. I can’t declare it official until tomorrow. But I think I have a new job now…